I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Randomize
