somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
