I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
