no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
