so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
