so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize