Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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