You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
