South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
