i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
