So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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