i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
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