Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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