TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
