When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
did you just send me my own nude
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
