if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
