took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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