who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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