I'm drive I can fine osifer
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
