How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
