I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
