so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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