AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
