You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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