This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize