Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
