I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
