3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
whose parrot is this?
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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