Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
A+ Viking dick
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
