Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
