I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
