Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
