is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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