dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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