And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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