Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
