i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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