You really coming over, don't trick.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Randomize