Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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