Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
