i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
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