Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
