Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
North Korea, Best Korea!
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
