Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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