im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
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