its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
