I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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