I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
