I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
