Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize
